Ayon hindi ko naman alam paano sisimulan to pero ayan lumang style na tong ginagawa ko gumagana naman eh. May pang intro. Anyway, these past few weeks sobrang daming nangyari. Madami dami din akong nasa isip na gusto ko sanang iblog. Yung iba nasulat ko na ayoko lang i-publish kasi nakakahiya lang din minsan. Baka kung ano pa isipin ng mga makakabasang kakilala ko. Sobrang frustrated ako sa mga pinagsusulat ko hindi ko kayang ibahagi. Pakiramdam ko kasi hindi ako maiintindihan ng mga tao. Siguro ako din ang may problema kaya hindi nila ako maintindihan. Sobrang daming frustrations. Frustrations o pagkabigo. Ano ba to bakit kailangan pa may ganito. Dito ko naisip bakit nga ba nagbibigo tayo sa buhay buhay natin. May naisip akong tatlong siguro pinakadahilan na din bakit tayo nabibigo o ika nga nafufrustrate.
Ang pinakauna para sa akin ay ang maling panahon na ikinabubuhay natin. Ibig kong sabihin ay yung mga taong nabubuhay sa nakaraan at nabubuhay sa hinaharap. Siguro lahat ng tao pinagdadaanan ito. Sa dinami ng mga masasaklap na pangyayari na nakaraan ng isang tao. Isinasakripisyo mo yung sarili mo ngayon hindi ka makagalaw ng maayos hindi ka makaisip ng tama dahil sa nangyari sa nakaraan. Nasisira ang kasalukuyan pati hinaharap natin dahil sa masyado nating pag-iisip sa nakaraan. Yung mga pag-iisip na paano kaya kung ganito, paano kaya kung ganon, paano kung hindi ko, paano kung.... at marami pang iba. Siguro wala naman masama kung isipin natin kaya lang hindi dapat tayo mabuhay sa nakaraan. Tama lang na magbalik tanaw tayo, malungkot, matuwa at kung ano pa man sa ating nakaraan. Sana gawin na lang natin tong inspirasyon para magpatuloy sa buhay hindi maging balakid sa atin. Marami rin naman mga tao na sobrang nabubuhay sa hinaharap. Ipon dito, ipon doon. Tipid dito, tipid doon. Asan na ang pera nakatago tago lang ng tago. Para sa hinaharap may pang gala at pang puntang ibang bansa. Ngunit pagdating naman ng panahon hindi na kayang makalakad hindi na kayang kumilos at maglakbay pa. Ginamit ang lakas ng katawan upang kumayod ng kumayod lamang nakakalimutan na ang sarili. Kaya't nagiging miserable o nabibigo tayo sa ngayon. Sabi nga nila "Live for today. Dream for tomorrow. Learn from the past." at gaya din ng sabi sa KungFuPanda " You are too concerned with what was and what will be. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is mystery, today is a gift, that's why it's called the present."
Ang ikalawa naman ang expectations o yang pagaasam. Dahil dyan maraming ng nabigo. Sa mga magulang na nageexpect sa kanilang mga anak. Ano ba namana ng kakayahan ng inyong anak. Mapipilit pa ninyo ang hindi niya gusto at magaasam kayo ng mataas? Maraming mga anak ang natatakot na baka hindi niya mapasaya ang kanilang mga anak dahil alam nilang sila ay inaasahan ng kanilang mga magulang. Dahil dito sa takot na ito, hindi makakilos ng tama at madalas lalong nasisira ang agos ng buhay. Madalas kapag hindi nakamtam ng anak ang inaasahan sa kanila ng mga magulang ay galit at palo ang inaabot. At ang mga anak nama'y umaasang lagi silang maiintindihan ng kanilang mga magulang. Umaasang maging tama ang mga maling ginagawa na wala naman silang kamuang-muang. Umaasang hindi sila papagalitan natin sa kamalian dahil alam nilang nagenjoy lang naman. Umaasang ibibigay lang lahat sa kanila at mananatiling malakas ang mga magulang habang panahon. Sana wag nalang tayo masyado mag expect. Hindi naman masama huwag lang yung sobra sobra. Hindi lang ito sa pamilya. Nangyayari din ito sa mga relasyon at mga pagkakaibigan. Mahirap hindi umasa pero kaya din naman natin na sabihin na lang kung ano yung saloobin na atin. Hindi yung kapag hindi natin natamasa yung inaasahan natin ay masisira tayo, mabibigo at masasaktan ang parehong tao. Pero huwag din natin kalimutan, sa sense na ang expectation na yan at isang flipside ng obligation; Kapag ang isang tao ay may obligasyon sa iyo, you usually have an expectation that that obligation will be fulfilled. Anyways medyo malalayo na at naiintindihan na naman ang punto. At sabi mga ni William Shakespeare - "Expectation is the root of all heartache"
At ang huli naman ay ang "unopenness." Madalas nakakalimutan natin ito, ang maging open sa mga bagay bagay. Masyado tayong nabubulad na sa kung ano lang ang tanggap sa atin. Tanggap sa lipunan, pamilya o social norms. Sana bigyan natin ang sarili natin ng lawak ng pag-iisip. Para sa ilang mga pagkakataon mahahayaan natin ang ating sarili na makapagisip sa mga bagay bagay. Hindi na lang tayo basta basta mabibigo dito. Magkaroon tayo ng openness to God's grace. O kung sino man ang iyong pinaniniwalaan. Iisa lang din naman iyan na nagbibigay ng biyaya rin.
Love Ties
Most things in the world aren't black, aren't white, aren't wrong, aren't right, but most of everything is just different. And now I know that there's nothing wrong with different, and that we can let things be different, we don't have to try and make them black or white, we can just let them be grey.
Friday, August 31, 2012
Sunday, August 19, 2012
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep.
My own eyes try to sleep, but they don't. They stay wide awake as time snarls forward and silence drops down, like measured thought.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
intertwine
me and you whispering
of ripple-wind and faerie wing
me and you undaunted
by our joyful scarring
me and you of twisting fates
in corridors of time
silence is the fire
that speaks to us in tongues
what is tomorrow it may never come
what is yesterday is now done
for we always were
we always will
we always are
we always intertwine
me and you finally
beholden grace
in our eyes
in our hands
unfolding space
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
The Great Flood 08/07/2012
NOAH ...
It is the year 2012 and Noah lives in the PHILIPPINES.The Lord speaks to Noah and says: "In one year I am going to make it rain and cover the whole Earth with water until all is destroyed. But I want you to save the righteous people and two of every kind of living thing on the earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark."
In a flash of lightning, God delivered the specifications for an Ark. Fearful and trembling, Noah took the plans and agreed to build the Ark. "Remember," said the Lord, "You must complete the Ark and bring everything aboard in one year." Exactly one year later, a fierce storm cloud covered the earth and all the seas of the earth went into tumult. The Lord saw Noah sitting in his front yard weeping. "Noah." He shouted, "Where is the Ark?" "Lord please forgive me!" cried Noah. "I did my best but there were big problems.
First,
I had to get a Mayor's permit for construction and your plans "did not comply with the codes".
I had to hire their "engineering firm" and "redraw" the plans.
Then I got into a fight with Municipal Fire Safety Inspector over whether or not the Ark needed a fire sprinkler system and extinguishers. Then my neighbours objected, claiming I was violating zoning ordinances by building the Ark in my front yard, so I had to get a permit from the municipal planning office.
The Municipal Planning office told me to get a barangay clearance. But when I went to the Barangay Captain, he said I should first get a permit from the municipal planning office. I got confused.
I had problems getting enough wood for the Ark, because there was a ban on cutting trees to protect the Monkey-Eating Eagle. I finally convinced the DENR that I needed the wood to save the eagles. However, the DENR won't let me catch any eagles. So, no eagles. The carpenters formed a union and went out on strike. I had to negotiate a settlement with the KMU. Now I have 16 carpenters on the Ark, but still no eagles. When I started rounding up the other animals, I got sued by an animal rights group. They objected to me only taking two of each kind
aboard.
Just when I got the suit dismissed, the DENR again notified me that I could not complete the Ark without filing an environmental impact assessment on your proposed flood. They didn't take very kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of the Creator of the universe.
Then the DPWH demanded a map of the proposed new flood plan. I sent them a globe. Right now, I am trying to resolve a complaint filed with the DOLE that I am practicing discrimination by not taking godless, unbelieving people aboard!
The BIR has seized all my assets, claiming that I'm building the Ark in preparation to flee the country to avoid paying taxes. I just got a notice from the BIR that I owe some kind of user tax and failed to register the Ark as a recreational watercraft. The NBI and ISAFP each wanted a piece of the action alleging that the Ark would be used by GMA to escape.
The PNP on the other hand insists that Mr. Arroyo might use the Ark to flee to the USA. Upon hearing my building the Ark, Congress did what they always do formed a fact-finding committee. I'm not worried about that though because they've never had anything done anyway.
Finally the Senate got the courts to issue a TRO against further construction of the Ark, saying that since God is flooding the earth, it is a religious event and therefore unconstitutional. I really don't think I can finish the Ark for another 10 or 16 years!"
Noah wailed. The sky began to clear, the sun began to shine and the seas began to calm. A rainbow arched across the sky. Noah looked up hopefully. "You mean you are not going to destroy the earth, Lord?"
"No," said the Lord sadly...."They are already doing that."
It is the year 2012 and Noah lives in the PHILIPPINES.The Lord speaks to Noah and says: "In one year I am going to make it rain and cover the whole Earth with water until all is destroyed. But I want you to save the righteous people and two of every kind of living thing on the earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark."
In a flash of lightning, God delivered the specifications for an Ark. Fearful and trembling, Noah took the plans and agreed to build the Ark. "Remember," said the Lord, "You must complete the Ark and bring everything aboard in one year." Exactly one year later, a fierce storm cloud covered the earth and all the seas of the earth went into tumult. The Lord saw Noah sitting in his front yard weeping. "Noah." He shouted, "Where is the Ark?" "Lord please forgive me!" cried Noah. "I did my best but there were big problems.
First,
I had to get a Mayor's permit for construction and your plans "did not comply with the codes".
I had to hire their "engineering firm" and "redraw" the plans.
Then I got into a fight with Municipal Fire Safety Inspector over whether or not the Ark needed a fire sprinkler system and extinguishers. Then my neighbours objected, claiming I was violating zoning ordinances by building the Ark in my front yard, so I had to get a permit from the municipal planning office.
The Municipal Planning office told me to get a barangay clearance. But when I went to the Barangay Captain, he said I should first get a permit from the municipal planning office. I got confused.
I had problems getting enough wood for the Ark, because there was a ban on cutting trees to protect the Monkey-Eating Eagle. I finally convinced the DENR that I needed the wood to save the eagles. However, the DENR won't let me catch any eagles. So, no eagles. The carpenters formed a union and went out on strike. I had to negotiate a settlement with the KMU. Now I have 16 carpenters on the Ark, but still no eagles. When I started rounding up the other animals, I got sued by an animal rights group. They objected to me only taking two of each kind
aboard.
Just when I got the suit dismissed, the DENR again notified me that I could not complete the Ark without filing an environmental impact assessment on your proposed flood. They didn't take very kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of the Creator of the universe.
Then the DPWH demanded a map of the proposed new flood plan. I sent them a globe. Right now, I am trying to resolve a complaint filed with the DOLE that I am practicing discrimination by not taking godless, unbelieving people aboard!
The BIR has seized all my assets, claiming that I'm building the Ark in preparation to flee the country to avoid paying taxes. I just got a notice from the BIR that I owe some kind of user tax and failed to register the Ark as a recreational watercraft. The NBI and ISAFP each wanted a piece of the action alleging that the Ark would be used by GMA to escape.
The PNP on the other hand insists that Mr. Arroyo might use the Ark to flee to the USA. Upon hearing my building the Ark, Congress did what they always do formed a fact-finding committee. I'm not worried about that though because they've never had anything done anyway.
Finally the Senate got the courts to issue a TRO against further construction of the Ark, saying that since God is flooding the earth, it is a religious event and therefore unconstitutional. I really don't think I can finish the Ark for another 10 or 16 years!"
Noah wailed. The sky began to clear, the sun began to shine and the seas began to calm. A rainbow arched across the sky. Noah looked up hopefully. "You mean you are not going to destroy the earth, Lord?"
"No," said the Lord sadly...."They are already doing that."
Monday, August 6, 2012
Nothing really. Mema.
“We’re born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we’re not alone.”
- Orson Welles.
//
I don't know what to say, really...
//
I don't know what to say, really...
//
Everywhere you go, perfection
Follows you the wrong direction
And you will never see it for
You get all that you need and more
You see it, you want it
You find it, it's yours.
But you can't say what you want or
Take what you want or
Choose the moods that you fake when you want
You said your life needed something special
Then where it's at, yeah
Well aren't you glad?
The only one of 5, exception
The child of your pride is deception
And on your list of things to do
Is make me fall in love with you
You find one, you want one
Cause I'm one, who plays, yeah
But you can't say what you want or
Take what you want or
Choose the moods that you fake when you want
You said your life needed something special
Which you don't have, yeah
You can't say what you want or
Take what you want or
Rest and wake any way that you want
You said your life needed something special
Well, here I am, yeah
Well, aren't you glad?
Follows you the wrong direction
And you will never see it for
You get all that you need and more
You see it, you want it
You find it, it's yours.
But you can't say what you want or
Take what you want or
Choose the moods that you fake when you want
You said your life needed something special
Then where it's at, yeah
Well aren't you glad?
The only one of 5, exception
The child of your pride is deception
And on your list of things to do
Is make me fall in love with you
You find one, you want one
Cause I'm one, who plays, yeah
But you can't say what you want or
Take what you want or
Choose the moods that you fake when you want
You said your life needed something special
Which you don't have, yeah
You can't say what you want or
Take what you want or
Rest and wake any way that you want
You said your life needed something special
Well, here I am, yeah
Well, aren't you glad?
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